Thursday, 26 February 2015

Striving, with some result

I am still struggling to pull myself out of the doldrums. Partly the winter, I think, and partly the result of a number of years, rather more full of stress and striving than are good for the human condition. A long tale and I won't bore you. I am trying to gently coax myself into a daily habit of meditation and mindfulness - both of which I have practised on and off for many a year. This to run in tandem with a six week stress release course to which I have been allotted. Sadly, as with all my strivings, their more off than on nature has resulted in a great sense of failure and that horrid little whisper at the back of the mind that says "you're gonna fail again y'know". Do wish she'd shut up!

These sea ripples, captured recently, remind me of the mind's untempered behaviour. Thoughts poke up above the surface of the hoped for meditative calm and before you know it, off the mind goes along one flow or another, carried to another place entirely, until you notice and draw it back to the peaceful place again, and again and again

I have managed four days in a row to spend a brief period of meditation each day and, perhaps, if I confess here, it will prompt me to maintain the habit a little longer than in the past. I would like to find myself on a shore where a daily practice brings me to a greater balance and equilibrium. My comfort is this - at least I'm still trying :-)

Friday, 6 February 2015

If you go down to the sea today

you'll get jolly cold, but you might find

in light
and space
through distance
by happenstance

Monday, 2 February 2015

Living in another land

I've been here in the last few weeks, time off, resting, enough brain power to begin reading, fascinated by this long ago, yet very human place and time. It may be a while before I finish these!

Back at work today, my hand aching like an incessant toothache, not entirely sure why, and labyrinthitis making any move from the absolute vertical a bit interesting, a trying day, but otherwise manageable. People were kind, and work got done